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» » Life After Loss: The Lessons of Grief
Life After Loss: The Lessons of Grief


Vamik D. Volkan,Elizabeth Zintl


Life After Loss: The Lessons of Grief



PDF ebook size:

1465 kb

ePub ebook size:

1586 kb

Fb2 ebook size:

1933 kb

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Scribner; Collier Books ed. edition (April 1, 1993)




Death and Grief



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Life After Loss: The Lessons of Grief by Vamik D. Volkan,Elizabeth Zintl

Describes normal and unresolved grief, offers advice on what to do when prolonged grief turns into depression, and explains how grief can be a vehicle for growth
One of the most clear and insightful books on loss and grief I have every read. Volkan explores the sizable challenges and intricacies of grief and loss through a psychoanalytical lens using two primary categories: uncomplicated and complicated mourning. He takes great care to acknowledge that grief and mourning are as personal and unique to each individual as their fingerprints. His concepts are clearly illustrated with moving case examples and his ideas are accessible to both layman and professional.
I wish they would republish this book, as it is currently out of print. I order copies whenever I can for friends/family going through the grief process. It is particularly helpful when dealing with a sudden, unexpected or violent death, one in which you never got to say goodbye.
My friend is a psychologist, she recently read this book and said it was amazing and extremely helpful to her claiming it 'literally explains all of my life'.. (Her father had committed suicide in her youth) [she would have given this book 5* for sure]

Since the book was thin, I thought it would be interesting to read though I'm perhaps not the best candidate for reading a book like this, I've had no major loss and not particularly interested in this area!

However I found this book useful to gain a perspective on how human beings typically mourn, both consciously and unconsciously. A perspective I didn't have before.

Even years after a death, subconsciously people can still be mourning, even though they think they have resolved the grief.

The book gives many real case studies of people with issues that learned to deal with their loss and explains typical pathways of healing that people tend to go through. e.g. denial, then bargaining e.g. with god.. then an acceptance.. etc etc It explains the role dreams have as showing the stage the mourner is currently in. Sometimes it's not just a loss of a person but could be anything, e.g. their youth, or security etc

The book also explains complicated losses, eg a mother may lose a son who was a hated murderer.. so eg the mother may not feel she is allowed to show her grief.. or the grief has mixed emotions, a deep sadness, but perhaps also embarrassment or anger.

Less obvious common phenomenon are also covered, eg 'linking objects' mourners typically have, it could be anything eg an object, or adopting a mannerism.. it's a connection to those passed away.

Overall, I feel I gained an understanding into the complex unconscious way human's can overcome loss.
Should I experience a major loss, or have a friend with a major loss in the future, I think I will have a better insight into how to heal the situation more gracefully.

Despite the sad subject matter, a positive and practical book.
As mentioned, I gave it 4*, but perhaps if Id had more personal life experience with this subject (like my friend), I may well have given this 5* !

P.s. I only leave reviews for a small percentage of books I read, because it takes a lot of time. I only want to do so if it is of some help to someone. If you find this review helpful please let me know as I have many more reviews I can leave if you want me to!

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