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» » Loving Someone Gay
Loving Someone Gay


Don Clark


Loving Someone Gay


Politics & Social Sciences

PDF ebook size:

1829 kb

ePub ebook size:

1112 kb

Fb2 ebook size:

1183 kb

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Lethe Press; 5th edition (November 15, 2009)




Social Sciences



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Loving Someone Gay by Don Clark

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For more than three decades, clinical psychologist, Don Clark, has been speaking to the hearts and minds of gay people, their families, friends, teachers and helpers in the many editions of Loving Someone Gay. With compassion he has promoted communication across generations as well as revealing a path of understanding and reconciliation for parents, siblings, husbands and wives as well as among religious leaders, teachers, librarians, legislators, judges, and law enforcement agencies. Most important he has provided vital insight into the psychodynamics and sociology of individuals, the gay men and lesbians who have been and continue to be misunderstood and abused in societies around the world. Clark states: "In this age of global misunderstanding in which we see old habits of prejudice and bigotry coming into question finally, the world cries out for communication and empathy. The time has come for any person who believes she or he is rational to offer a helping hand to a gay sister or brother, here or there, known or unknown. Previously unquestioned rules are changing. No person is free to dare to be exactly who she or he is until that person is willing to offer understanding, respect and affection to the gay person who yearns only for that same freedom." With this latest updated edition of his famous book, Dr. Clark shines a clear light into our future in the twenty-first century.
This is one of my favorite books and,as a Mental Health therapist, one I recommend to individuals and families. It really helps! This version has been updated by the author and is available in soft cover or (if you are shy or lack shelf space) in Kindle version. I highly recommend this book as part of your LGBTQAI library. Very helpful, nurturing, and informative.
I am a 61 year old Gay man who fell in love with my now husband, together 31 years with him. All my life I had battled with conformity and by reading Loving Someone Gay, I can now put the pieces of my life together. I am one of the lucky ones to have a partner most of my gay life. I was married to a woman at a very young age and as you can imagine it was a disaster for me and for my wife as well. Religion and Politics have caused me a lot of pain and this book has helped me understand why. I highly recommend it to anyone who is gay, or non-gay people who want to learn how to love their gay family/friend unconditionally. I want to buy a copy for everyone in my family, doubtful if they want to read it but I will try anyway. Thank you so very much Dr. Clark you are a great American Hero.
A well written, informative book. It's easy to read, is full of helpful information which re enforces all people are equal.
Updated classic of gay self-help, seems to cover all the bases, so a comprehensive, mostly well-written book. Some typos and a couple bits where I thought “hang on” – such as when he asserts that gays on average are more attractive than heterosexuals – but otherwise a decent enough book. Since there are no characters and setting, I’m going with how useful/readable the book is. It could have used dome addresses and contact details for gay self-help groups/websites of organization, so still pretty low tech/less than completely modern/updated.

Very hard book to judge on terms I judged the others since it's neither a fictional story nor a memoir. I think it helped a lot of people, not to mention it may be very mind-broading:)
It's a shame about the title. It's completely misleading. I'm sure most people would think that you would give this book to some straight friend or relative who has a gay or lesbian person in their lives who has recently come out. Wrong.

This book is for you......if you are gay or lesbian. I'm sure it has other uses but essentially about self-education, self-awareness. It is a classic and has stood the test of time (how many editions have there been). As the review says "First written over 20 years ago, Loving Some Gay has become one of the most respected sources of information about gay people for those who are not members of the gay community. "

But don't think the information will be dated. It's intensely relevant. Clinical psychologist, Don Clark, is no theorist, his information and insights come from many years of experience. It's practical and most importantly I think, accessible to the average reader.

I found myself underlining a lot as I read. Good stuff whether you are sorting things out, recently out or a bit of a seasoned'll still learn.

Here is one gem

"Some gay youngsters immerse themselves in religion; some become model students and perfect children. These same children may have emotional breakdowns, the result of having carried too large an invisible emotional strain. Some commit suicide. Families and friends grieve while having no idea that they themselves may have contributed to the youngsters misery. One hears that Juan or Susie "had everything to live for – why this?". family and friends may speculate that someone slipped a drug into to the unsuspecting youngsters food or drink. It doesn't occur to anyone that the lethal agent may have been the socially approved conspiracy of disapproval that is born of sanctioned, pious prejudice".

The last two sections of the book, even though for non-gay people are also interesting and would be extremely helpful for anyone. This is where the title does become relevant for family members or anyone who works with or has a relationship with gay and lesbian people.

Anthony Venn-Brown
Author of A Life of Unlearning
I read this book and loved it. It's broken down into 3 parts; loving yourself, relationships, society. The first part helped me accept who I was and who I am, the second part is amazing. It is like a class called relationships 101. It is the part of the book that I have most highlighted and made notes on. It explains and helps you express what you want, expect and don'ts out of any relationship.
It is so good. I have passed it on to friends who are having trouble in paradise and it has helped them talk things through with their significant others.
I read the book - the only one of it's kind - when originally published. As a child born to a religious family, I felt bad and sinful as I began to have feelings for boys my age. I could not talk to anyone. I just knew that something bad would happen should I disclose my secret.

This book helped me begin to repair the self-loathing I felt.

Read it, please. It is more about loving yourself in a world that hates you.

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